Sometimes I wish I weren’t such a good listener but that is the selfish mom in me talking. I just don’t want to always hear about the horrible things that happened to my step son. Not because I am horrible but because it hurts to hear it but I am a good listener and he needs to get it out. He told me that his step father used a paddle when he was spanked that he carved himself. He said he was planning on putting holes in it but never got around to it because he broke it on him. I asked him why he didn’t tell the police this and he said “I told them I was spanked but not about the paddle because I didn’t want him to get in trouble”. But I say SPEAK BOY! I wish I could scream at him to speak up. He says he never wants to leave us again but in order to insure his safety here he has to tell his life to people other than me. Nobody listens to me! But then again, maybe that is why it is me he tells. Today he told me that his step father got really drunk once and told him he killed another man, put a bullet right in his head and buried him with the gun in an old cemetery out in the middle of nowhere. I don’t know if the man really killed someone or only told the kid that to scare the shit out of him. Either way it still disturbs the hell out of me and I would not doubt if it were in fact true. He is a bully, meth addict and a violent alcoholic, anything is possible when you consider that. I am starting to think I need to record our conversations because who the hell COULD believe half of what this child tells me? He also told me that the fight which lead to him being here, the fist fight his mother and step dad had was instigated by his mother. He said he was in his room and heard a slap, he then walked out of his room and saw his mom beating his step dad with a board all the way out the door in the back. What kind of scum beats a man in the back as he is trying to leave? Because that is what the boy said, that his step dad was trying to leave and his mother just kept beating him. Eh, who knows! I don’t know how human beings can live their lives with so much damn drama.